Lost in Translation, Part 1

My friend Rosanna asked if I could post some pictures of funny English mistranslations. Honestly, Thailand hasn’t been a great source of ridiculously bad English. A lot of people here speak very good to passable English.

Even the old lady at the fruit stand can quote me a price in English. This is good because I’ve only managed to learn to count to three, so unless my bananas cost three baht or less, I’m in trouble.

So here are some of my favorites from Thailand (so far)!

Thanks for the recommendation, Nick!

Always remember, freedom isn’t free! It’s available for the price of a tasty curry.

I ate at this ominously named restaurant:

I didn't die after eating at this restaurant, but I sure felt like I was going to!

I didn’t die after eating here, but I sure felt like I was going to!

I’m trying to imagine the pitch meeting for this ad:

I could list all the ways this ad is sexist, but it would make me cry.

I could list all the ways this ad is sexist, but it would make me cry.

Purra Marketing Exec: We need to sell more water to women. Our studies have shown that women are the primary water buying decision makers.

Purra Ad Agency Exec: We should try to appeal to their emotional side. We all know that women are emotional. It’s because of their weird lady-parts and hormones and stuff.

Purra Marketing Exec: Yeah, my wife just won’t stop crying whenever she’s on her monthlies.

Purra Ad Agency Exec: Wait! That’s it!

Purra Marketing Exec: Co-marketing with sanitary products?

Purra Ad Agency Exec: Don’t be gross. Hear me out, I’m having a Don Draper moment. Tears are made of water. Purra water is made of water.

Purra Marketing Exec: This is genius. I can’t believe no one realized that before. Have the intern write some copy and find us a stock photo of some crying lady’s face. I want to go national with this by next week.